It’s nice to not really be an English speaker because I can say “Fuck” and if people are offended they can still think “it’s okay, he’s French and he’s a little stupid like French people are“. But anyway, I’m not that stupid and “fuck” is my favorite english word. (I know I’m a yogi, I should say my favorite word is “Bliss” or “Lotus”… But no, it’s “Fuck”) The sound of it… It ‘s powerful… I was reading about its etymology and it’s kind of hard to trace… It’s like one of these words that literally sounds like what it means. It couldn’t be something else.

So when I talk naturally, without trying to censor myself I usually say “Fuck” quite often, not a lot but often. It’s like in French I say a lot of “putain”, “merde” or “enculé”. I don’t know why… Perhaps I have childhood problem I haven’t dealt with yet or perhaps I don’t think it’s impolite or vulgar either, because it’s not. There’s much more vulgarity in many politically correct expressions and falsely polished ideas. I mean, just watch the news…

But what I feel really impolite is: the “F-word” or “F*ck” or “F%*!”. Why do people say/write that? I see it everywhere on Facebook or in emails, twitter. Why? Seriously, everybody knows that you mean “Fuck”. Kids know it, they are not stupid… Your Mom knows it too. So why are you doing it?

And you want to know what is even more fucked up? It’s that you actually don’t say it so you feel good about supposedly being polite. But when I read it I think “ah yes, he means ‘fuck’…” and you make me say it for you. You are not doing anything but you make me swear in my head and I’m supposed to feel bad about it since you censor yourself because swearing is wrong… How twisted is that? When I think about it it gives me headaches…

So next time you write “F*ck” and you think you’re so clever, just go back and write “Fuck” for real (or don’t at all!) and stand for what you say. It’s not a big thing really but it’s a little step towards being more aligned with who you are (even it’s about saying “fuck”).

Thank you… sincerely!

For long I thought I was respecting myself but I was just wasting my time. I was just doing what I wanted to do. This is not respecting yourself, this is listening to your lizard brain who only wants to survive and get lazy. This is not what I truly want to be: I have no desire to be remembered as lazy. And as I keep reminding myself: I’m probably the laziest guy I know. This is quite embarrassing actually. All this time I have wasted just because I did “what I wanted to do”.

“What do I want?” is probably not the right question… “Who do I want to be?” seems more appropriate.

I would like to decipher the code of this world. I have the feeling that most people wear distorsion glasses. Perhaps if you are a Zen master or a Swami you have found a way to take these glasses off. I’m still wearing them and all this time I thought I was living in the world, I was just blindly being carried by something I didn’t even see. It takes a lot of humility to accept it that your vision is probably false. And at the same time it’s easy to accept and have a glimpse at this real world.

Letting go is a way of not making your distorsion glasses worse. That’s why many people tell you to let go and this is great… But it doesn’t make your glasses clearer either. Observing the way you appreciate your experiences is much more useful if you want to advance in deciphering the world. Quite often I find myself judging instead of observing. Do you think scientists who study Cancer judge this disease? Probably not… They would get too depressed. They observe it, they observe the way it works, the way it infects tissues. I’m pretty sure they can be fascinated even! In the end they find a way to understand the disease and they realize that their vision was just distorted the whole time… But without these countless days of observing they would not be able to figure out shit.

I love science and I believe scientists are probably the best philosophers. And I’m seriously quite surprised that most Swamis have a really good knowledge of physics and science in general. I wouldn’t have thought of that before studying more of their writings. We should act like them and use a scientific approach. However most people (including me) are so confident that their own bullshit is so “right” that they don’t take time to observe what is going on in their lives. It’s easy to judge and say others are wrong but you are probably as wrong as many. Judging is faster. But how can you judge if you know when you realize that you are probably not seeing things clearly? Judging is probably the worst form of disrespect you can give yourself.

This is why I’m observing more. I want to adopt the scientist mind in all situations.

• I’m facing a problem: How can I analyze it and make it easier to solve?
• I’m having a good time with friends: What are the sensations? How does it change my perception of the world?
• Someone giving me some bad news: What process do I enter in? Am I in control or am I letting my feelings take over?
• I’m bored: What is going inside me? How deep is this feeling of emptiness?

When you stop judging the situations you are living things become lighter and distorsions fade off a bit. Most situations are much simpler when you don’t let your emotions making you spiral out of control. This is what I think of when I start doing “what I want to do”. Am I doing it as a reaction to escape a situation or am I truly respecting myself and observing what is happening?

Just try to observe what is going on in your daily life, it doesn’t need to be extraordinary to start with. Most “insignificant” situations can often tell you more about yourself and the world than the emotion charged ones.

And when you consciously observe what happens and respect yourself, you become a better part of this world. It’s probably the best way to start deciphering the world, don’t you think?

Last week, one of my facebook friend (whom I could call an acquaintance more than a friend) posted a racist meme on his wall. This day when I opened my news feed I saw this image saying that basically Muslims are all terrorists in disguise (and it was trying to be funny and clever but it was really not). It’s not the first time this guy posts shit like this but usually I see it and I don’t do anything except this time I couldn’t take it and I surprised myself : I told him he was a fucking jackass.

Most people usually don’t do anything in this case . They probably disagree with this kind of statement but they just take it in and it stays somewhere inside them until they start to think it’s normal. It’s probably what happened to this guy: he got used to certain situations and thinks that it’s funny to discriminate a whole culture because he has simply become a douchebag. And most people don’t react because they think it’s ok to express yourself like this about others because … I don’t know… just take a look at how TV and movies depict other cultures: they’re either evil or cute and innocent poor bastards.

I’m probably dumb for realizing this now: all of us are genuinely good persons but we absorb so many tensions that we’re becoming someone else. People are not really happy but they don’t know why and in fact it’s simple: they are just dealing with too many tensions! There is nothing new here, reacting is normal… you probably think you act when in fact you react to something (I’m hungry –> I need food –> I need money –> I’m working). So why not extending this and get cleared of all tensions?

• Someone post a racist meme, I clearly comment back to tell him that he’s a fucking racist and I block him… I don’t want see more of this shit.
• Yesterday I’ve been yelled at by a driver who thought it was appropriate to tell “I’m going to kill you fucker!” because I was in front of him with my bike and he couldn’t pass me. So I answered to him… in the same tone. I think he will remember it.
• I see people asking for change, I give them some change. 

Every of these actions have an incredible impact on my well-being. I thought my journey to self-realization or whatever was to be quiet but in fact I was not being quiet I was being passive. I was just accumulating tensions in silence. I don’t find any peace in this. Peace comes from rebalancing your tensions. And yes this is extremely selfish. That means that ultimately you help others because you feel uneasy seeing them suffering (and you don’t want to feel uneasy). Or you’re being really strong with someone because he’s being an asshole and it makes you feel bad. Yes, it’s extremely selfish but any kind of action is ultimately really selfish, you have to accept it.

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My quest is to find and work on who I truly am and accumulating more tensions is just making it more difficult. I can’t take that shit anymore.

What tensions are you getting used to? How do you compensate for them?

What are the ones you have to deal with?

Raw vegan lasagna is, I think, my favorite raw vegan meal

I was supposed to post this one earlier. It has been almost a month since I have started to eat “normal” food again. Eight weeks ago I started a 4 week raw vegan experiment. This was a suggestion of some friends who do the yoga teacher training session with me. So, I did it because I wanted to see how it was and also because some people told me it would be impossible. At first I thought it was a diet but it was more like a detox. Anyway, I like to think of it as “an experiment” because I don’t really believe everything that is not raw vegan is toxic. I believe in moderation and I think it works, at least for me.

The rules

They were pretty simple:

• only raw fruits and vegetables (with the exceptions of 30% of cooked or warm vegetables for supper if needed)
• no processed food
• no cereals
• no alcohol
• no coffee, no tea, no sugar, no milk, no honey…

It was a little more complicated than that and there was food proportions to respect for each meal but I did not respect it. I tried to make it “easy” and it was already good enough like that.

The cheats and the fails

Ok… I can’t really say I have succeeded since I have cheated a couple times. Nothing big but I just want to be honest.

• I ate one bowl of granola during the first week. I actually did not pay to much attention to the cereal part of the deal and ended up eating some. 
• I drank 2-3 glasses of wine at the end of the third week with friends in a restaurant
• I ate two spoons of rice in a raw vegan restaurant… They are supposed to have no cereal on their menu but apparently they had some during winter because, well… because it’s winter.

I think that’s it. So it’s not too bad. I just feel bad about the wine. I could have controlled myself on this one.

If you don’t eat meat and cereals you get all weak

That’s how I have been raised. Actually, for along time I thought vegetables were just giving you more fibers to digest easily. I didn’t think they were actually giving you nutrients. Nobody really told me. So the big surprise was that I was not so hungry during the detox. I never had this sensation of having a full stomach either though. But my energy level was pretty much “normal”. The thing is I had to eat more often to keep my energy constant. After a while I was more satisfied to have energy than having a full stomach. This shift in my energy perception is the real goal of the diet according to me.

Also you spend less energy digesting when you just eat vegetables and fruits. This helps too: you don’t get as much energy but you don’t consume as much. I found myself being really “light”. This was particularly a good time for yoga practice.

I thought I would miss caffeine but it was actually easy to live without it. I was a big coffee drinker but I’m better at it now. Sometime I like to get caffeinated but most of the time I’m happy with tea. So it was not too bad to just drink decaffeinated herbal tea.

It’s funny how many people thought it was not technically possible to this detox. A couple people were even concerned for my health. So I think that what I believed before is still what most people believe. I don’t know why we are not more educated about food actually, but this is another debate.

Grocery shopping, cooking and going out

This was actually the part that took a lot of time and energy! First you think you can just eat salads, sprouts and fruits but it gets annoying pretty quick. So I’ve tried to add a little variety. My wife gave me a raw vegan recipe book which helped a lot. But it required to spend a lot of time shopping. The good thing is I discovered a lot of new ingredients I never heard of before. Also you can’t buy something and expect it to last more than a couple of days so you have to shop again.

My regimen had much more nuts than usual and these are quite expensive. Overall the whole thing is more expensive. I did a little calculation and it seems that I’ve spent around 25% more in groceries during the detox.

Preparing food took much more time too. Since I wanted it to be original, it was not unusual to spend more than one hour getting a meal together. Most of the time it was fun because I spent more time in the kitchen with my wife working on our little experiments.

Now the  real pain was to go out. There is only one good raw vegan place that I know of in Montreal (Crudessence). Otherwise you can still order salads in other places but usually you have to remove things. It’s hard to find a salad in a “normal” restaurant without having them throwing chicken or bacon in it. And also you pay for the full salad even if you don’t have all the ingredients inside. I tried a couple vegetarian restaurants and I found them to be a complete rip-off (15$ for a lettuce-cucumber-avocado salad on a small plate for example). It’s probably because vegetarian also means hipster (at least in Montreal). So if you find a vegetarian place you also pay for the hype.

Back to “normal”

I think my body got accustomed to this diet pretty fast. But I honestly wanted a good glass of beer more than anything else. I’m not a big drinker but I like beer and wine with moderation. And when my diet was finished the first thingI had was a beer .

During the first days after the diet, cereals felt really heavy so eating just a little was enough. That’s where you realize how much energy you spend eating cereals.

The thing is I felt weaker after the diet than during the diet. Actually I lost this sensation of being “light”. I also hurt my back pretty bad one week after the end of the diet (and that’s why it took me so long to write this, simply because I couldn’t stay in front of computer for more than 15 minutes straight, I feel better now, thank you). My osteopath tells me it’s not just a back problem but that my digestive system was the origin of the problem. So I believe my body was in shock when I went back to “normal”.

If I had to do this experiment again (and I think I will one day), I would do it during the summer. Eating mostly cold food during winter is not that easy and I think it would be easier with warm weather. Also it’s easier if somebody does it with you. My wife played the game and ate the same food as I was for every meal we shared. She was a great help. I can’t really imagine myself eating salad if she had been eating pizza next to me…

But the whole thing didn’t make me want to turn vegan. I include much more fruits and vegetables in my meals but I like meat. I like cheese. And I like cereals. All with moderation.

If you have tried a similar diet/detox or if you have any question about this experiment, drop a line in the comment section. If you were/are vegan, I’m interested also in your opinion. Did you turn vegan for health reason, moral reason, hype…? I don’t know, I just need to understand it a little better…

Let me explain: from my point of view everything is fine. I don’t worry because taxes may perhaps go up, because “the economical crisis is not over”or because people are pro or against gay marriages. I hear what happens because some people talk about it but I try to not worry more about it if I can’t do anything about it. I’ve actually filled a journal every night before going to bed since October. One of the question I’ve answered everyday in the journal was: what made you angry today? Well, Listening to the news was always coming back. It made me angry, worried. And when I worry I don’t perform well in any activity. I don’t know about you but I don’t like feeling like that, so I’ve decided that it would be easy to just cut the news out of my life.

And since I feel more optimistic because I’m not getting influenced my negative news, I believe I also bring a little more optimism to the world. My impact may be minimal but I don’t care, it’s still a little something.

Now… it’s fucking difficult to avoid the news. Perhaps it’s because I’m living in the city. You don’t get that much exposure in the country. Here are what I’m trying to not pay attention to:

• TV and radio: This is pretty easy, I just change the station if I start to hear the news. I don’t really listen to the radio and I don’t watch much TV and usually it’s just for video streaming or to watch a DVD.
• Newspapers: I never buy newspapers (ha!). We have 2 free newspapers in Montreal. They are distributed at bus stations or in the metro. I don’t take them. The trick is to not peak at what others are reading in the subway. It’s kind of difficult when you have dozens of people around displaying the front page of the paper. So, I generally try to read something on my kindle app or I just close my eyes and listen to my ipod or, better, I meditate.
• Magazines and blogs: well, this is the only thing I read. Actually the only magazine I read is Wired. In some ways, they talk about the news but it’s really different from the everyday news. Blogs are also some kind of news and the line between some blogs and news websites is really blurry. I try to focus on personal blogs or sites that may evoque global issues but don’t just talk what is on the front page of newspapers. I like to read articles about technology (because this is my field, I would look dumb as an app developer if I did not know what the new OS is bringing)
• TV screens (everywhere): Montreal in known for its underground city. Well, it’s a little nightmare if you try to avoid the news. Basically the underground city is like big malls connected together by tunnels and metro stations. And the underground city is nice when it’s minus 40 outside  (and by the way… yes, minus 40 degrees Celsius is the same as minus 40 degrees Fahrenheit and it’s also called “Are you kidding me? I’m staying inside”). So when you walk in the underground city, you basically walk through food courts and there are TVs everywhere, because people can’t focus on eating. Even worse, in the metro, they have these screens telling you when the next train is coming and also displaying news in a loop. Just try to look the minutes on the top-right corner of the screen and not watch videos of war right under…
• People: you can’t really avoid them. So when they talk about the news I try to talk about why I don’t watch the news to change the subject. But sometimes I just ask them because it’s this awkward moment in the conversation when you don’t know what to say. The advantage is that the news are filtered this way and you can know what is going in 2 minutes instead of spending hours following news flash. That’s how I know about gun debates in US, gay mariages in France, war in Mali and Lance Armstrong. I also see some news that friends share on facebook or twitter. This is tricky because I don’t know if it comes from a newspaper or a blog… So I have this rule: I consider that if somebody I know points me to the news, I’m allowed to read it. That’s how I read an article about how the trend of eating quinoa in the western world was actually bad for South America. This kind of article is not really what you usually hear in the news anyway. This is more like an little investigation like the ones you can find in magazines. Well, this one happened to be from the Guardian… I suppose, I’ll call that the “gray zone”.

The fun thing (well… I don’t know if it really fun or if I should be worried about it) is that it’s really strange to see people jump on the news like junkies on crack. Yu know like it’s really important for them. perhaps it’s really important for some people because they need to be aware of what is going on in the world. I imagine traders need it for example. But I don’t think the everyday guy really needs to know what happened 10000 miles from him.

And finally when you don’t read the news but still have some involuntary glimpses of news, you realize how much bullshit this all is. So I sound like an ignorant bastard when I say I didn’t really paid a lot attention to what happened in this school in Connecticut. Of course, what happened is awful…  It’s awful every time a kid dies but there are thousand of kids dying of hunger around the world everyday. And this is actually something we could change if we cared a little but apparently it’s more important to have endless debates about guns (which by the way make people more worried about violence and more inclined to buy guns to defend themselves). Also, I’m pretty sure there would not be so many massacres if we stopped talking about them… The news make it some kind of sick trend… I don’t really know who is to blame: guns or news about guns? That’s why I believe watching the news really doesn’t help the world getting better. It’s just a certain point of view anyway, a certain kind of knowledge. Who said it was the “right” knowledge?

So I’m asking you: Do you watch/read the news? Does it make you a better person?

These are becoming my favorite kind of food right now

Today I am starting a 4 week vegan diet experiment. And by experiment, I mean that I intend to experiment with new kind of foods, not that I will give up after 2 days if it’s hard. I know that it’s not that big of a deal for a lot of people (who are already following this diet) but for the rest of people who have always eaten “normal” food like everybody, it’s kind of a big deal.

Lately I had the feeling that was eating too much junk. Christmas is probably one cause, but in general I often end up eating processed food when fixing a salad would be as fast and generally better.Let’s make things clear: I’m omnivore. I eat pretty much all kind of food. I like almost everything (with the exception of andouillette, a french sausage that smells like poop… And I mean poop like when you are sick). I have never followed any diet. I’ve paid a little more attention to what I ate in the past two years but I never went crazy and stop completely to eat one kind of food. I also don’t intend to be a vegan for the rest of my life. That may happen, but right now, all I want is to experiment with the way I eat.

So what are the rules of this diet?

Well… it’s pretty simple. Eat only non processed fruits and vegetables. With the exceptions of organic almond milk, decaffeinated tea, spices and any dehydrated fruits or vegetable. I consider those as processed since they have been dehydrated. I have  document that a friend gave me with all the rules for this diet… And it says it’s good for beginners to have some cooked vegetables for supper. I will also allow myself to have some home made soups or to warm up vegetables since it’s Winter, it’s Canada and it’s fucking freezing. I don’t intend to overcook anything either, I just want something warm from time to time.

Also, no coffee, no tea, no alcohol, no candies, no chocolates, no bread, no Lucky Charms…

The goal here is not to suffer. I don’t want go through this diet and decide I will never do it again because it was to difficult. No, the main goal is to reprogram my diet. The whole idea came from some of my yoga teaching training partners. This is some kind of detox thing. And since one of the main aspect of yoga is the concept of non attachment, I think it’s a good idea to experiment with food, since, you know, you are made from the food you eat (e.g. there are some beef originated atoms in your brain). Also food has a great emotional impact. It’s more than just nutrients, it’s a way to satisfy our senses and to socialize (one quick french reference: one possible translation for “friend” is “copain” and that means “the person I share my bread with”… see what I mean?). All our great rituals (like family meetings, parties, religious related events…) involve food at some point. That’s why I think it’s interesting to be a little more detached from food and actually start to have an objective point of view on the way I am eating.

Problems that I may encounter

I already tried this diet for a couple of days in December just to know what I am getting into. I’ve also started to eat only fruits for breakfast for the past week. So I kind of have some feelings about it. Three things worry me a little:

1. Being hungry

When I experimented with it, I had this feeling of being hungry at some times of the day, generally during the afternoon. The thing is that my stomach is used to feel some weight when I eat. This is what happens when you eat a lot of cereals, sweets or meat. When you only eat fruits an vegetables, you don’t get this weight. That does not mean that you don’t get enough food, it’s just that it travels a little faster. I believe that my brain gets satisfaction from food because it feels this weight and not because it feels that my body is full of energy. Think of it this way: if you eat a burger and french fries, you feel satisfied but you also feel kind of tired and floppy. So the feeling in your stomach is not really related to the level of energy the food is bringing to you. I know this is kind of “duh… I know that” and yes everybody knows how they would feel after eating rich food but evidently we try to ignore it or we don’t consider food as a premium fuel for our bodies. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be so many fast foods around. So this is the whole point actually: I want to reprogram the way I feel satisfied by food. I’ve been raised thinking that rich food is something that gives you energy but in fact I never really felt it that way. So there is probably going to have some difficult times but I think in the end I will be more conscious of what is good for me.

2. Lacking energy

This is related to the previous point but I’m really afraid of being tired faster because I don’t have as much food. For some reason I have this feeling that meals including pastas, meat, rice gives me a more reserves. It’s probably not completely false. In fact I don’t know a lot on this subject. It seems that you can be raw vegan and still have a lot of energy (many of my yoga friends are and they seem all right). Also,  you can take a lot of energy just from breathing. Again that’s what yoga is about. I’ve never tried this for several days so I don’t have a clear idea of where I am going but I believe I have the tools to deal with this. I really want to work on my pranayama (which I could quickly describe as “energy management through breathing”, if you have no idea of what I am talking about) and I think this diet will probably push me to.

3. Social interactions

I mostly eat at home but sometime I eat outside with friends. A little more than a year ago I stopped alcohol for three months. And believe me, when you don’t drink alcohol you feel kind of stupid when you are having a crazy night out with your pals. I don’t know if it will be the same with food. I already planned to meet some clients and know some of these meeting will end in a restaurant. I have no idea if I can find a salad without bread, cheese, chicken that will satisfy my appetite in any restaurant. I don’t want want me a party pooper either so I guess I will find a way to adapt. There are a couple of good vegan restaurants in Montreal. I hope I will be able to incite my friends and/or clients to go there with me.

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Finally this whole thing is supposed to be enjoyable. I don’t want to eat boring salads every day. No, I want to learn to make new kind of meals, I want to feel better and be generally more efficient. Also, I recently started to experiment with sprouting. It’s easy, it’s cheap and it gives you food full of excellent nutrients. I’m still no specialist in sprouting but just google it, you’ll find tons of references. Watch it, it’s addicting… Now every time I go to the grocery store I wonder what kind of new seeds or grains I could sprout. My kitchen is turning into a sprouting laboratory. So far my favorites are green lentils spouts. I could eat tons of them.

So there, I think , I’m accountable now, that’s exactly what I wanted. I may write again about this during the process… And I will definitely write about it when it’s over (or perhaps I will never stop… who knows?)

Did you do similar diets? If yes, please share your experience. I want to extend my knowledge on this subject and I’m sure other readers would be interested. Thanks!

Ok, this post is probably a mistake…. Because it talks about beliefs, religions and spirituality and other stuff that people really think they are right about when they have no clue of what they are talking about. It’s not an anti-religion or anti-spirituality post. On the contrary, this post is for those who think they are right and can’t consider another point of view. To all you extremists and fanatics, this post is about opening up and accepting that we are wrong. And it’s something we don’t really like to admit, right? This post is also quite long, so you have been warned: will you be able to read until the end without checking your facebook account?

I say this is a mistake but it’s probably the best post I ever wrote or at least this is the post I’m the most satisfied with.

I start to question a lot of things. I just can’t believe we are stuck in a system that tends to makes us all really similar. That scares me. The more we do that, the more we end up not tolerating other cultures, other opinions. Even “open-minded” people start to seem really fanatics in some ways. That’s why I want to expose four reasons to question our assumptions… Just so that we are clear things up a little.

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Reason 1: Most of our knowledge is wrong.

I was talking with a friend this morning. She is studying ecology from a classic point of view (like we are taught in “normal” schools) but also in relation with Inuit’s beliefs. She was telling me that our science doesn’t make any sense according to them. Because their science has different models than ours. So does that makes them right or wrong? I don’t know… They where in Canada way before it was named Canada, Also they didn’t end up throwing plastic and oil in the ocean. So it’s really hard to say that they are wrong and we, from this modern western culture, are right.

If you think about how science perceived the world a couple centuries ago, it seems awfully wrong. I mean we believed the Earth was flat and that we were at the center of the Universe. Then we started to understand about our place in the solar system (by the way, other civilizations found that one out several thousand years before western civilization). Fast forward… Einstein demonstrated the theory of relativity that pretty much said every previous physics theories were a big load of crap, so we started to think “ok… relativity, this is right, that explains the whole universe. We were so dumb before …”. Now several other guys demonstrated that actually Einstein was wrong. And you now what? These guys are probably wrong too…In a couple of centuries, people will look at our civilization and they will laugh at us.

Conclusion 1: There is no real truth. We just tend toward some convenient truth that fits what we are able to conceive. Since science is supposed to be the ultimate tool to separate right from wrong, we should theoretically put our faith in it. But we know that fundamentals are probably wrong. This is a sign that we can start questioning everything.

Reason 2: Most of the norms of our every day life are random

For example:

• ties or bow-ties… They are weird, don’t you think? I mean, they look good but I don’t really know why… Why do we wear those and not  pink flowers around our necks instead?
• Why do we clap our hands at the end of a show? We could sing “lalalalalalalalalala….” instead but we don’t.
• Why do we eat 3 times a day and not 4 or just 2?
• Why do we think eating insects is disgusting when eating chicken raised in a factory and fed with chemicals is totally ok for most of us?
• Why are we more scared of terrorism than car accidents? Or at least why do we talk more about terrorism than safe driving habits in the news?
• Why do we want to live for along time? (it seems that a lot of great influencers died quite young: Kurt Cobain, Steve Jobs, Jimi Hendrix…) Why aren’t we taught to take the fast lane?
• Why is paper size 8,5×11 in. in North America and 21×29,7 cm in France and whatever in other countries. Why is not square or round?
• Why are we still using Qwerty keyboards when we know there are way more efficient ways of typing?

I could go like that forever…  Just look around you and try to think of why stuff are made like that? Why are they better like that? And what is “better” actually?

Conclusion 2: Most of our world is made of stuff that we did not really conceived to be efficient or even understandable. They were just convenient and nobody tried to do something else, so we are stuck with what we have. Try to go to another country and see how their norms are not the same. And it’s not because they found a better way but simply because their random evolution ended up like that.

Reason 3: We have been formatted to fit in the world we live in.

I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. On one hand I see that as alienating but on the other hand it’s good to have the tools to make the most of the society we are going to spend our lifetime in. But did we choose that or not?

Can we really decide what education we want to have? It seems that going to college is the ultimate goal. But it’s not so special since everybody can go with just a little effort. It’s actually becoming a product we can buy with a loan like every other stuff you don’t really need but you still want (I’m not better and I include myself in that “we”). The other day, I saw an ad for a college and the incentive was that they give free iPads to all their students. Everything is made so that you get there and get the knowledge “you should get” and a free ipad (don’t forget it, it’s really important, it’s a fucking ipad! It’s a good trade in exchange of learning something that is perhaps bullshit). When you think of it, the teachings proposed in college are really limited compared to all the different genres and cultures around. If you want to learn Iroquois traditional pottery or how to speak Bantu, going to college will not help you with that. So we don’t do it, because it’s not a “good” thing to learn if you want to fit the society. But perhaps, the world would find values in Iroquois traditional pottery that would make us understand the whole pattern of the universe in slightly different way.

Conclusion 3: Everything we have learned are just made to perpetuate a system that is scared of change. Oh, of course, we “evolve” but not that much. We stay between safe boundaries. I don’t think there is a big bad conspiracy behind all that. It’s rather our collective mind that tends to self protect.

Fact #4: We follow blindly some cults that we don’t really understand

Cults are not just religion. Think of how much faith you put in any brand, in your favorite TV program, your favorite singer or actor. Do you have doubts sometime? It seems that faith and beliefs are incompatible with doubts. (and again I am not just talking about religion, but yes, it includes religion). That scares the shit out of me. I can’t count how many people I describe as fanatics. Generally because they reject an idea and find a refuge in an other idea on the other side of the spectrum. Why do you put more interest in something rather than another?

I watched a TV program yesterday night.People were debating and their conclusion was that Christmas is too religious. They were rejecting any kind of religious beliefs (and why not? I mean, nobody forces nobody to believe in God or celebrate Christmas or whatever… it’s all fine if you don’t). They were saying that buying more stuff was basically the essence of Christmas time (ok, I don’t really agree with that but hey… if it makes you deeply happy and make a good impact on the world, go for it!). What made me tick is that they were really angry at people who still see some spiritual value in Christmas. What I find there is that these people have no idea of why they celebrate Christmas. They just follow a protocol that they don’t agree with. Why the fuck are they doing that? If Christmas having religious origins makes you really uneasy, don’t celebrate it and continue to enjoy your life… You have all my respect for thinking for yourself. But please don’t insult people who believe in something you don’t understand.

I take this Christmas example, but it can be applied to all the people who have no idea about what Islam faith is and criticize it. Or even all the people who put a little Buddha as a decoration in their living-room and think that makes them zen like Buddhists. There is so much ignorance around religions that put their faith in values they don’t understand. Think of all these Apple fans, Star Wars fans, Metallica fans, NFL fans… I mean the die hard ones. Don’t you think their practices are really close to religious practice?

I have serious doubts about my religious and spiritual beliefs and I think it is healthy. I define myself as a Christian but it’s something that is not static. It evolves, I try to understand why I believe in something higher than us. I understand why I celebrate Christmas but I am not blindly agreeing with everything Christianity says. And when I don’t agree I try to observe why it makes me react like that. I respect people who don’t share my beliefs. I’m actually happy that people think differently. It would be seriously boring if everybody agreed all the time. And I think we all have our place.

Conclusion #4: Question your beliefs. Why do you believe in something and not in something else? How would you react if a church was using the same marketing techniques as Apple or Nike? The answer is not so easy…

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 It’s time to pop some neuron connections and reprogram our brains

I start to really losing trust in anything I have learned. Even new things. I question everything. Because anything  can potentially turn into a big load of crap.

I talked with a friend about yoga the other day. He was not comfortable with the spiritual aspect of it. Honestly I was not either until I realized I was confronted with ideas that made me uncomfortable. When you read some yoga books, they talk about masters who are able to be in several places at the same time, die and come back to life or who can change consistency of matter. At first, you think ” What a load of bullshit…”. I think it’s wrong to react like that. Why not take that and say “Why not?…”. Who can prove it is not possible? We are not even sure of our laws of physics so how can we reject other ideas like that?

That’s how we should react when we are confronted to something new. Understand, acknowledge and put this in the complex equations of your beliefs. That’s what it really means to be open minded. It’s about breaking the chains of your beliefs and be able to compare them as objectively as possible with something else.

Try to do something that you don’t believe in. At least, try to understand why you don’t believe in it or why you are not interested. Everything happens for a reason so it’s good to question things that you think should not happen but still do. Like wars, or corruption or killers or nuclear weapons… How the world would be if those things didn’t exist? Better or worse? For example, I read somewhere that Hitler was close to be diagnose by Freud when he was a kid, but it didn’t happen for some random reason. What if it happened and Freud “cured” him and World War II never happened? The world would probably be very different. USA wouldn’t be as powerful as they are. Israel would probably not exist as it is now. Japan? I don’t know… Perhaps everything would be more peaceful. Perhaps some other fanatics would have started something even worse than World War II. I just want to make it clear nothing is black or white. And even if we are supposed to be advanced, we are still far from understanding why we are here, why some stuff happen and what are the consequences of what we do.

This post a call to respect and acceptance of others. What seems crazy today may be the scientific reality tomorrow. Our senses just give us a little glimpse of what the world is. Why can’t we just accept that and let go of we have learned and start to really experience life with our own references?

That’s why we must disobey, be weird, doubt and question everything (even this whole post).

Because when we stop questioning things and respecting other points of views, our minds get enclosed in little prisons.

This one of the posts you read 14825 times about facing your fears, except this one is different. Because fear is a big deal for me so I tried to understand more about it and I found that

actually there is something quite comfortable in fear.

Fear is like a headstand

First, let me talk about headstands. This is something I’m continually working on because I’m not naturally good with inversions. (By the way, I always feel like shit when I see new yoga students who are able to perform a headstand two weeks after discovering yoga, when I spent 2 years and my headstand is not quite perfect yet). So yeah, this thing about being upside down, it scares the hell out of me. I don’t like it. Sometime, I think about it and I’m like “why the fuck I am doing this?”. But I see the psychological and physiological effects it has on me so that’s why I want to continue.

When you are on your head, it’s hard to find a balance. But somewhere there is tiny area where everything falls into place. When you begin, you don’t even really feel this area, you just navigate around it. Sometime you feel it for just an instant but you have already passed it and you fall. But when you are able to stay in this zone something mag

ic happens and the headstand becomes not more difficult than staying on your feet (well… still a little more challenging though). And the more you go to this area, the easier it is to find and the bigger it gets (that’s what she said).

So, you see, fear is like the frigging headstand. When you enter fear everything seems difficult, you think you will fall every moment. But after a while you find this little zone where you can play inside your fear. And the more you get there, the more this zone grows with you.

Fear does not exist

What? Yes… This is actually what you realize when you are in the eye of the fear storm. You can start to explore from inside your fear and this is a totally different point of view than watching it form far away. Fear is just a projection of your mind into the real world. This is something you imagine will happen (perhaps) in the future. But you are living now and the future does not exist. And since fear resides in the future it does not exist either.

Going to the comfort zone inside fear is like going to the bathroom at 3am without turning any lights on (bonus points if you’ve watched The Shining the evening before that). You are being careful but lights or no lights, you know the path. Eventually you can do this without opening your eyes either. Because it’s not because it’s 3am and you watch the Shining that things are different. It’s just fear right… and when you walk to your bathroom you realize that Jack Nicholson is not in you hallway.

So just go inside your fear. Say yes to projects that you think are impossible for you. Try to take a little risk and observe what happens. Observation is the key when you are inside your fear. Because this will show you that your safe zone extends farther than you think and there is much more to explore than what you think.

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If you liked this post, you will probably be interested in these ones:

• Why we should be thankful for fear. No really. by Jamie Yost. Really good post about seeing values in fear.
• Everything but the girl by Niall Doherty. Niall explains why he pushes himself into uncomfortable situations.

Also my friend Chase, released his latest story Holden. I really like his style. And since you are cool people, I’m sure you will enjoy this story. You can get it on his website.

And finally… I have just opened a facebook page for this blog! You can like it to show your support and/or follow what is happening here.

Thank you! Have a great day!!

Can’t see the video? Click here.

This is the very first video post I publish on this site. I told myself, if you want to publish something about authenticity, why not try to be actually a little more authentic and show who you are in a video.

I always thought I was wearing many hats in life: the good friend, the husband, the software developer, the manager, the student, etc… And I’ve tried for long to play a different role for each of these hats… Because I was told: if you are a manager, you don’t wear blue jeans at work or if you are a good freind, you have to go drink beers with your friends every Saturday night and if you are a software developer you must spend your time in front of a computer and make linux related jokes…. There are all sorts of unofficial rules that push us to act in a particular way in particular circonstances just because “we do it like this”. At some point all these hats became masks and I was just hiding behind an image I thought was me. It hink that’s what happen to a lot of us.

Did you ever find a new blog or site without any humanity? We don’t really know who is behind or perhaps we know but it’s a fake alias. Do you really trust this kind of sites? I don’t really. If I feel that’s something is being hidden, I also feel that something is odd.

Authenticity works way better (and playing different roles and be conform to what other people expect from us is exhausting). It’s interesting to be yourself and act in your professional life as you act in your personal life. In the end, there is no real separation between professional and personnal lives if we stay genuine, it’s the same life, right? People like when we stay between the boundaries of normality but you would actually be surprised to see what happens if you let your inner-nerd express himself and if you just are a little more human. That’s what we really want… We don’t really care about appearances. We put more trust in someone who has weaknesses like everybody than in someone who is too perfect.

So why are we not authentic all the time then? Is it disturbing? Are we scared to expose ourselves? If it was really the case, nobody would have a Facebook account. This is proof that there is something in us that want to show  others who we are, what we do, what we like, etc… And we all want to know a little more about our friends. It’s cool when we are a little weird, when we show our weaknesses and when we do stuff others don’t understand. Their reactions can be good or bad, but in fact they want to know why we are like this: true. For example I take a picture of me everyday to make a video where you will be able to see me getting older. When I talk about I often get a look that says “you are weird”… So maybe, people will laugh at us, perhaps we will surprise them and maybe we will inspire others… This is what you can obtain from being authentic. And how to really be authentic? Well… Don’t think of it and just do what has to be done.

‘m working on this in my articles here and this is why I leave comments open. Because I see this blog like a chat around a good meal and not like a school presentation. And that’s also why I will add videos to my articles from time to time. Just so you can see if I shaved my beard (and also to give you a glimpse of the weather here)

What do you do to be more authentic ?

Life is hard, isn’t it?

Being Grateful

I have been practicing gratitude lately (no it’s not because Thanksgiving is coming, but yes I publish this post during Thanksgiving week and I realize I will fall in this trend of grateful posts). Actually, it is part of my yoga teacher’s training. Everyday I answer a list of questions about what I did during the days and I observe how my life evolves (for those who are interested: it follows Yamas and Niyamas). One of the questions is “What are you grateful for today?” I think this is the question that resonates the most with me. Because I’m not perfect and I have this tendency, like many, to get frustrated by what life throws at me.

An exemple of ranting

“Of course the metro was stopped because some idiot tried to force a door open… And it made me late for a meeting. I ran, I was sweaty, I looked like shit. So it didn’t help looking serious in front of my client,etc…” I can rant like that for hours, but in the end it does not solve any problem. Actually it makes things worse. I’m sure you are also used to experiment frustrating events like this one, right?

What if instead I was just grateful because of the time I had to read more in the metro? What if I was just actually happy to have a meeting in the first place and be able to interact with people I respect. Oh yeah I was a little late, but whatever… Or maybe just laugh at how ridiculous my mind is when ranting. I mean, it was really not that bad, right?

You are lucky

It’s easy to take this world for granted. I’m not sure that we realize how lucky we are to just live on a planet that sustain life. Lately, I have been grateful to just be human. For all I know I could be a fly and eat shit, can you imagine that? How lucky you are that your soul was sent somehow into a human body… I’m even grateful to have this ability to experience pain, frustration and anger and all these complex emotions. And the more I’m grateful, the more good opportunities seem to come to me. Is it a consequence or a cause? I don’t really know… The world is too complex to really understand what is going on.

If you can read this. You are flipping lucky. Perhaps you are on the other side of the world, but we can communicate together, how cool is that? That means that you canconnect with the entire world. You can access knowledge, you can create a business. Go tell about internet to Leonardo Da Vinci, Einstein or Henry Ford. Imagine how they would have been grateful to have a tool like this one… You can actually change the world. It has never been so easy.

Really, there is no excuse for worries. No excuse for thinking of how life can be hard. There is no excuse to not live as a superhero. There is no excuse to complaints. We are lucky, its about time to act like it. And more, it’s actually our duty to make the most of it.

So I’m asking this question: What are you grateful for today?